I was told, the other day, that I was so lucky to be able to live as I do.
I bit my snippy retort back and left, quickly.
She obviously doesn't realise that if you want a decent life you have to put the graft in.
If you read blogs and watch podcasts you soon understand that most of the writers/podcasters have worked or are still working very hard to get where they are and stay there.
Luck has little or nothing to do with it.
I do, however, consider myself fortunate in my upbringing. The mantra "The Devil finds work for idle hands" rings loud and clear down the paths of my memory.
The only time that my Grandmother sat totally still was to listen to The Archers.
Just look at the self sufficiency blogs, these writers have worked and saved to build their dream. More hard work follows to sustain that life, animals do not feed themselves or do the mucking out.
Vegetables do not pop out of the ground miraculously, the plants that do are weeds.
I work at my crafts, yarn does not turn itself into socks and garments while I loll around eating sweets and reading bodice rippers.
My fabric and patterns do not turn themselves into clothes while I sleep.
Look at Mean Queen, she worked hard to retire and still works hard at her lifestyle. The only difference is that what she does now is by choice.
Crafting takes lots of energy, both physical and mental.
The person who got up my nose does no crafts, a little gardening and minimal cooking and housework is the extent of her activities. She does however watch lots of telly and reads 3 or 4 books a week.
I watch telly, but have knitting or hand sewing to work at.
I feel better for getting that out of my system so I will finish my coffee and get busy. Ben had a longer walk this morning and I have washing on the line as we should get heavy rain later.
TTFN Pam
Yes, I agree - those comments are irritating to say the least. I used to get the same comments. I chose to retire early at age 50 from the NHS. But, in my 30 years of working I combined bringing up 3 children with working and with the support of hubby (also working) managed to juggle everything family/home life entails. The comments that I was lucky to retire early from lucky stay at home mums used to fall on deaf ears! (Cutting our cloth accordingly is my new job).
ReplyDeleteSome people pass through life with blinkers firmly fixed, nothing is ever their fault, they blame "them" and "the benefits system" for all the things that they haven't got.
DeleteWholeheartedly agree, Pam. You have the lovely life you enjoy now as a result of years of hard work. Very few of us are fortunate enough to have things/money/house/lifestyle just handed to us on a plate. We have the life we enjoy now through hard work and years of planning (although the house we live in now did come about by sheer chance after OH happened to mention to a colleague at work that we were looking for a new home, to which the colleague replied that the house next door to him was shortly to be empty).
ReplyDeleteThe thing that annoys me the most is when people, upon hearing that I don't go out to work (by choice, I'm nowhere near pension age yet), ask "What do you do with yourself all day?". It's usually accompanied by a slightly sneering look, as if they think I just sit on my bum watching daytime TV and scoffing crisps all day.
I was asked if I intended to get a part time job after I retired. I laughed and said that some days I hardly had time to get dressed I was so busy.
DeleteLuck has nothing to do with it!. Planning does!.
ReplyDeleteIn 2 months time I will have paid off my mortgage 14 years early at 52.
Sure has not been easy, tight budget, yellow sticker food ,lodger, charity shop clothes. But just about there.
Paid a lot in to pension from 18 taking it out and retiring to Greece at 55.
Meanwhile at work I hear Collegues say the are skiint paying half salary for posh flats, Sky, new clothes, nights out hair do,s that cost over£100.
Then say I,m lucky to have own house and retire at 55. I have not told them house almost paid for!😀.
Luck no determination and planning yes.
Watching Collegues on pay day at midnight on nightshift makes me wan,t to grab and shake them!.They have lived on noodles for a week then blow hundreds on crap because they deserve it!.
DeleteI love food so always have lovely meals prepared for work, lots of veg and fruit. Collegues admire my food but bring in ready made sandwich, coffee n crisps costing over£6 Mine costs prob around £1.50.
Been there, heard all the sob stories about the money running out while there is still a lot of month left. All while they bars of chocolate and puff away cigarettes, oh not forgetting the Chinese/curry.pizza take away that was washed down with a couple of bottles of wine.
DeleteA girl at work always skint just returned from magaluf, all on credit card!.
DeleteAll inclusive but said she preferred to eat out!. Asked how much she spent in the week over and above all inclusive. Reply £1200. I just about fell off my chair. She told me holidays are for spoiling yourself!.Ye gods. She has £97 to last 3 weeks until pay day .Already trying to get other people to pay her bus fare and scrounge food. When I said no to paying her bus fare she looked shocked!.
Well done Pam, I hate the you've been lucky remarks, as I agree with you it's hard work rather than luck
ReplyDeleteI feel that I did well to walk away, but I was too angry to speak.
DeleteYes, it does annoy me sometimes. I know I go on about pleasing myself what I do now, but I remember years of hard graft, buying and selling twice, years of being skint because all my money went into the house. People forget how much interest we had to pay on our mortgages.
ReplyDeleteI've just been called 'smug', on the MSE forum. The question was how many bank accounts do you have. My answer, only one, and I know exactly how much money I have in it, and don't need to separate my finances into separate accounts. Just because us retirees have planned our lives and have everything sorted we are talked about as if we are called smug.
I have 2 bank accounts, 1 for all the household expenses and my crafting account. I like to keep that separate, it just helps me to keep an eye on what I spend and of course I can never overspend.
DeleteHow annoying and rude! I don't 'work', but I am a carer and put my spare time and energy into keeping our finances on track and looking after the house and garden. I doubt I will ever properly retire in the traditional sense, yet I have frequently been sneered at by those who spend all their time working at jobs they don't enjoy to buy yet more things they don't need, all the while moaning that they don't have any 'quality time' with their families.
ReplyDeleteI don't think that she was being rude deliberately, she genuinely thinks that I am lucky. Perhaps she was unfortunate to have a mother who did not hand down a crafting way of life or a work ethic.
DeleteInteresting thing is .... The harder you work, the 'luckier' you seem to be! Funny that, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteYes, it is very strange.
DeleteFirst, I have to say I enjoy your blog though I seldom comment. (Shame on me.) I have always lived below my means and was raised by parents who only bought what they could pay for. When I was a kid, we had no credit cards, no mortgage, no vehicle payment, etc. If we didn't have the money to pay for it, we just didn't get it until the money had been saved. My parents worked very hard and my brother and I worked part-time jobs once we were old enough. You are so right that it is planning, choices we make and hard work that enables a good retirement.
ReplyDeleteNo need to comment, although I enjoy reading them. I think that for every one who had a similar upbringing there is one (or more) who didn't. If you grow through childhood with no decent role model it must be hard to break free of the mould.
DeleteI don't believe in luck either, just hard work
ReplyDeleteWe were all taught that you only get out of life what you are prepared to put in. We were also shown how much better fun times are when you have worked for them.
DeleteSadly you will never change this point of view so its not worth wasting your energy on it. Like you we have worked hard, gone without when the children were little to give them a better life and reap the benefits now of having private pensions. Luck has never come into it, we planned and worked hard for our early retirement the same has you have.
ReplyDeleteYou are so right.
DeleteI worked full time plus a second job to pay off my mortgage by the time I was 49. I started paying when interest rates were 14%! Yes it was hard work but worth it. I wouldn't dream of telling people to stop wasting their money on remortgaging, to fund extentions, refitting dated kitchens, having 3 holidays a year, bing designer children clothes etc. etc. Yet this is what my friends have done and then tell me i'm lucky to have no mortgage!
ReplyDeleteI made my own luck.
Enjoy your wonderful life Pam, you deserve it.
I remember the days of high interest payments, some months it meant that I was really inventive in the kitchen. I new about "rubber chicken" long before the super scrimpers had been thought of.
DeleteA couple came with their delightful daughter to bottle feed our lambs. They sat in our field while their daughter washed bottles, carried water for the hens and then filled pots with compost. She then asked for more jobs, so she and I trimmed some bamboo for canes. She really enjoyed herself. Her mother said. "I could sit here all day if I lived here" she said "You are so lucky to have such a lovely place" In the one and a half hours that the family were here, she didn't engage with what her daughter was doing and never moved from her seat. "I love the country, you are so lucky to live here" was her parting shot. I was fuming, mostly for the sake of her daughter, who "got it".
ReplyDeleteThere is no answer to that. Hopefully she will not fall into their ways.
DeleteI couldn't agree more about 'being lucky'! I've worked hard to hang on to my house and now it's time for that effort to pay off. I'll still be working hard in my new life, but it won't feel like work to me when it's something I've wanted for so long :D
ReplyDeleteI wish crafting would do itself sometimes, but the joy is in the work and the finished product.x
I have read so many times that if you find a job doing something you love, then it no longer a job.
DeleteWell said!
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteI think that person who peed you off is purely jealous. I'm like you though, I manage to watch a lot of telly, but I'm always multitasking - though I'm much slower with the needles!! Balls to the haters! X
ReplyDeleteNot really jealous, just in a different zone. She is basically a lovely person who has not quite grasped the reality of life.
DeleteI think we are all fortunate to be able to craft in whatever capacity we do, but we plan time to do it, we have worked hard to earn the money to afford it and it helps us create and feel productive. For those that don't get that just let them go, they have other priorities and that is fine.
ReplyDelete